


going, going, gone

by sylphrenas



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Alternate Ending, Angst, Gen, So much angst, but yeah they die again, does it count as death if they were already ghosts, this is really rough have fun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:55:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27376831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sylphrenas/pseuds/sylphrenas
Summary: what if julie didn't save the boys? very angsty alternate ending to episode 9.“Hey, Julie?” Luke said softly. Other than when he’d seen his parents, Julie didn’t think she’d ever seen him this quiet. She hated it, and her heart ached as he continued, “Could you- could you maybe sing something for us? Before we-” His voice broke completely and he swiped at his eyes with his palm. “Before we go.”
Relationships: Alex & Julie Molina & Luke Patterson & Reggie
Comments: 27
Kudos: 93
Collections: JATP Appreciation Week





	going, going, gone

“Thank you.”

“...You’re welcome.”

“Dude!”

Julie gasped and flipped the lights on in the studio to reveal all three of her boys curled up on the floor. If she wasn’t so worried, it would almost have been adorable the way they were all leaning on each other.

“What are you guys doing here?” She demanded, her hands gripping her own hair at the roots and pulling hard. “I thought- I thought you crossed over.”

Alex sat up slightly and winced painfully. “I guess playing at the Orpheum wasn’t our unfinished business.”

“Point, Caleb,” Reggie muttered, cheeks flushed like he had a bad fever. Like Julie’s mom had looked before-  _ No. _

“We wanted you to think that we crossed over,” Luke added, and something felt deeply, irrevocably  _ wrong  _ as he continued, “We just didn’t know where else to go.” He let out an involuntary, broken sob that immediately cut off as soon as he realized what was happening, and something in Julie twisted hard.

Reggie winced and said, “We thought you’d go straight to bed.”

“Well, I knew she wouldn’t but none of you ever listen to me-” Alex’s words were interrupted by another jolt of purple light, and all three boys doubled over in agony. Julie felt her own chest ache for them and she stepped forward desperately.

“Please, go save yourselves. Go join Caleb, do whatever you need to do, just save yourselves, please!” Her voice broke at the end and she trailed off, “Do it for me.”

Reggie shook his head, a grimace etched on his face as he said, “No. We’re not going back there.” Julie’s eyes widened and she was about to insist again when Luke stood up unsteadily.

“No music is worth making, Julie, if we’re not making it with you.” Julie opened her mouth in protest and desperation, but Luke continued almost soothingly, “No regrets.”

Julie let out a loud sob and threw herself at Luke, arms outstretched—

And she fell through him, collapsing on the ground as he turned to look at her in shock and pain. She looked up from the floor and let out a broken cry of anguish, curling in on herself and wrapping her arms around herself in a pathetic echo of the hug Luke couldn’t give her.

“Julie-” Luke started, but Julie didn’t hear him.  _ Couldn’t  _ hear him. Couldn’t bear to hear his voice knowing it was going to be gone so soon.

Reggie quietly said, “Julie, please-”

“No!” Julie cried, burying her head further into her arms and trying to cover her ears. “I can’t- I don’t-”

“Julie!” The word was so sharp, so desperate, so  _ painfully  _ not Alex that Julie instinctively looked up.  _ Oh. Oh, no. _ Her boys were in front of her, now, leaning on each other for support. 

As Julie continued to watch in transfixed horror, another jolt shook their bodies and they coughed, barely able to breathe, much less stay standing.

“It’s okay,” Luke said softly, and Julie met his eyes with her own as she shook her head.

“It’s not okay!” Julie said, rubbing her eyes with childishly clenched fists. “It’s not  _ fair!  _ I couldn’t save you, and now you’re going to be gone forever-”

Alex started to take a step forward, winced in pain, and stayed put. “You’re going to be oka-”

“You can’t leave me too!” The words burst out from Julie’s throat before she was even aware of them. The boys stood in stunned silence before their eyes softened in grief and understanding. 

“I’ve barely started to move on from my mom,” Julie continued, “And her- her  _ death  _ still stays with me every single day. And now I have to lose you too? I can’t be alone again. I  _ can’t. _ ”

“You won’t be alone,” Reggie said firmly, and Julie looked up through a haze of tears. “You have Flynn, and you have your music. And of course it’s going to hurt. But we’ll always be with you, even if we’re not… with you.”

Julie couldn’t help but giggle, though it was more sniffling than actual laughter. “Reggie, I think that’s the wisest thing you’ve ever said.”

“Well, you know me,” Reggie said with a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes, “I’m just so wise. Always so full of wisdom and-” He broke off coughing and Alex rubbed his back soothingly though his eyes were panicked and fearful.

“Hey, Julie?” Luke said softly. Other than when he’d seen his parents, Julie didn’t think she’d ever seen him this quiet. She hated it, and her heart ached as he continued, “Could you- could you maybe sing something for us? Before we-” His voice broke completely and he swiped at his eyes with his palm. “Before we go.”

Julie had to forcibly press her hand to her mouth and bite her tongue so she wouldn’t start sobbing again. Instead, she squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, opened them again, and smiled slightly. It  _ hurt. _

Slowly, she walked over to the piano and sat down. She deliberated for a moment, and then nodded to herself and placed her hands down on the keys.

_ Here’s one thing I want you to know _

_ You got some place to go _

_ Life’s a test, yes, but you go toe to toe _

_ You don’t give up, no, you grow _

She glanced at Alex and saw him smiling through tears, not bothering to wipe them away. 

_ And you use your pain _

_ ‘Cause it makes you you _

_ Though I wish I could hold you through it _

She turned her eyes to Reggie who was stubbornly wiping his tears away as they fell down his face. He offered her a crooked grin before his expression shook slightly and he pressed a fist to his mouth.

_ I know it’s not the same _

_ You got living to do _

_ And I just want you to do it _

She looked at Luke. Her Luke. He was stubbornly refusing to look at her but she saw the shiny tear tracks make their way down his face. She kept her eyes on him until he looked back at her, and then she gifted him with a gentle smile. He began to return it but then his face crumpled and he turned away again.

_ So get up, get out, relight that spark _

_ You know the rest by heart _

She gazed at all three of her boys as she began the chorus. Sunset Curve. Julie & the Phantoms. Alex, Reggie, and Luke. Her voice wobbled slightly but she closed her eyes, let the tears fall, and continued singing.

_ It's not what you lost _

_ It's what you'll gain raising your voice in the rain _

_ Wake up your dream and make it true _

_ Look out, look inside of you _

_ It's not what you lost _

_ Relight that spark, time to come out of the dark _

_ Wake up, wake up _

Julie slowly opened her eyes again and glanced in the boys’ direction. Or rather, what  _ was _ the boys’ direction. The studio was empty, and she was alone.  _ Again.  _ Somewhere deep inside her heart, something broke. But a little bit closer to the surface, something gave her a gentle push. And she resumed her song.

_ Better wake those demons _

_ Just look them in the eye _

_ No reason not to try _

_ Life can be a mess _

_ I won't let it cloud my mind _

_ I'll let my fingers fly _

_ And I use the pain 'cause it's part of me _

_ And I'm ready to power through it _

_ Gonna find the strength, find the melody _

_ 'Cause you showed me how to do it _

She sang the chorus again, voice rising in strength after every falter or break. She closed her eyes and saw them. Alex, grinning and encouraging her to continue in his awkward but impossibly supportive way. Reggie, cheering her on, whooping and whistling and filling her with energy. Luke, giving her  _ those  _ eyes and complimenting her in every way. And her mom, sitting beside her, guiding her hands and hugging her so tight.  _ You can do it.  _ And she knew they were right.

_ So wake that spirit, spirit _

_ I wanna hear it, hear it _

_ No need to fear it, you’re not alone _

_ You’re gonna find your way, oh _

Their voices and faces all coalesced in her mind and she felt the tears fall faster.  _ You’re so close now. You can’t stop.  _ Their voices rose in her mind, and she took a deep breath.  _ I know. _

_ Wake up, wake up if it's all you do _

_ Look out, look inside of you _

_ It's not what you lost _

_ It's what you'll gain raising your voice in the rain _

_ Wake up your dream and make it true _

_ Look out, look inside of you _

_ When you feel lost _

_ Relight that spark, time to come out of the dark _

_ Wake up, mm, wake up _

Her eyes fluttered slowly open after a few moments of silence, and she took a deep breath that was cut off by a gasp. All four of them- Alex, Reggie, Luke, and her mother- were standing in front of the piano, beaming at her.

“Guys?” Julie asked disbelievingly, fresh tears springing to her eyes. “Mom? Are you really here?”

Though she already knew, it hurt just the same when her mom shook her head.  _ No.  _

“We’re so proud of you, Julie,” her mom said, and Julie didn’t know what hurt more- her voice being the exact same as she remembered, or her mom’s smile being nearly identical to her own. 

“I miss you,” she whispered, wrapping her arms around herself and wiping her tears away with her sleeve. “I don’t know what to do without you guys here with me.”

“What are you talking about, Julie?” Julie looked up to see her mom right in front of her, a hand raised to cradle her cheek but never making contact. Behind her, the boys smiled, purely and genuinely, and Julie had never seen them so utterly happy. “We’ll be right here with you.”

Julie smiled, sniffled and brought her sleeved fists back to her eyes to wipe them free of tears. When she looked up again, they were gone. But somehow, it felt a little bit more okay.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!! kudos and comments appreciated <3
> 
> yell at me on tumblr @blue-drarry-drarry-blue


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